100 Days of Jules, Day 34: A Ranking of Julianne’s Boyfriends Depending On If I Would Date Them

She’ll never find better than Ryan Seacrest.

Here is where I attempt to blog about Julianne Hough for 100 days straight. This was inspired by Allie Jones’ 500 blogs on Kristin Cavallari, a much funnier read.

Julianne Hough has had exactly six boyfriends, according to this YouTube video and I have approximately all the time in the world to rank them depending on if I would date them or not. Here we go.

6. Zack Wilson
Even though he can sing and dance, which means he’s probably a lil gay, which I would enjoy, but he is Mormon and married, so I doubt he would be interested in dating me.

5. Brooks Laich
Listen, I’m sure Brooks Laich, the man Julianne is currently married to, is a nice guy, but he’s not my type. He looooooves the outdoors and he has a podcast called What Men Really Think or something like that, and honestly, I can think of two worse personality traits.

4. Mark Ballas
Julianne dated Dancing With The Stars pro Mark Ballas when they were children living in London getting trained in dance by Mark’s parents, but he’s still on the list. I think Mark would be a fine boyfriend, he sings and dances, which is nice, but I can’t say I’m overcome with feelings when thinking about him.

3. Chuck Wicks
Listen, I know very little about Chuck Wicks except he was once a country singer and now I’m pretty sure he’s on a podcast where he interviews more successful country singers. He’s hot but also like probably really boring, I have nothing.

2. Ari Sandel
OK, I did not know about this guy, but apparently Julianne dated him between Ryan Seacrest and Brooks Laich. He’s an Oscar-winning filmmaker, which is nice, and he’s hot, which is nicer. I watched exactly one interview with him and he seemed fine, kind of dumb, but he’ll do.

1. Ryan Seacrest
OK, there really is no competition, Ryan Seacrest is the best man alive, everyone should be allowed to date him. He’s rich, he’s hot, and he can get you into all the cool Hollywood parties, but like he’s not an actor who has to kiss hot woman for his job, all he does is talk on the radio. Plus, if you dated Ryan Seacrest, you could become best friends with Kelly Ripa, which is one of my life goals, and Ryan just seems like a great guy, I really have nothing more to say, Ryan + Julianne forever.

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